Thursday, January 24, 2008

Irritated

I haven't had much inspiration to write the last two days. I just cant find the inspiration to do much these days. I am blaming it all on the crappy weather. I wonder if the sun's gone into hiding or something. 2 Weeks with cloudy skies and rain rain rain is enough to drive anyone over the edge. Its like the world is dull and dreary and miserable.

I am irritated with everything. I have an interview this afternoon. I know that I need to prepare for it - but im not phased by it. It should be fine - I hope. So Sweets and I had the dreaded conversation again. This time it was more serious and I could feel him getting a little uptight. In the past we would have gotten angry and upset and a fight would have brewed. In this case we sat civilly both trying to compromise and let the other know how we feel. I was very nice about it but also very diplomatic. I am not going to back down. I know that I am probably being mean but living with his family is just ridiculous. Not when we both can afford to live on our own. I must admit that at times I felt like a lawyer putting her case forward. A very weak case. But than again his was even weaker. I just hope against all odds that I get what I want. I might be selfish but I am trying to look at the broader picture and living with his parents is just going to cause unnecessary strain on our relationship. I don't have anything against them - i mean they have never been nasty or mean to me. But they are very different and I just feel that in today's day and age it doesn't make sense. I just hope that gets to see my point of view instead of being blinded. I know that it would be for the best.

I am writing an exam in a weeks time. I haven't even started studying. It's a course that I did last year as I needed the credit to gain entrance into a study programme. So I enrolled and it wasnt the most easiest of tasks. It really is hard to work and study and I take my hat off to all those people who seem to manage it so effortlessly. It's an open book exam and those are supposed to be easy right? Wrong. I will study this weekend.

I am feeling so drained.... I wish it were Friday already....

2 comments:

Sleepyjane said...

Oh I now how you feel. I've bee down in the dumps and I get do angry at myself for feeling that way. Must be the weather.

And as for moving in together. J and I are also testing the waters and considering it.

Good luck with your test and your interview! I hope it goes really well!

Blue Sunflower said...

Its like this crappy feeling is going around like some flu bug...

I am sure you and J will be happy. I read your post just now and he seems to make you really happy. And that is what counts in the end. It will work out you'll see.

Thanks for the luck - will let you know how it went....

Blue