Sunday, July 26, 2009

Fun Times....

I began a post on Friday afternoon, but work always stands in the way between me and blogging. Hmmm priorities.....

Friday was a really interesting day. The dramas with Marsha finally came to a head. Her poor performance issues were referred to the Employee Relations dept which led into a disciplinary enquiry which ultimately led to her dismissal on Friday. Nowhere during all this was I involved, but I had to be the one to tell her that we are not confirming her employment any longer and she will have to leave right away. She resisted signing any documents and when I asked her to complete a termination pack she became rather difficult. I had to explain to her that the termination pack is standard practice for anyone leaving the organisation and finally after numerous calls to her lawyer, she signed.

I than had to go with her to her office and watch while she cleared up her things and than had to escort her out the building. I decided not to get into any conversations with her and rather just did the motions. I don't trust her as she has on numerous occasions told people stuff that I have said when I didn't. Finally the drama is over, for now though, as she made it very clear that she will be referring this matter to the CCMA. I know that our ER dept is very good at dealing with stuff like this but am not sure if we will be involved at all. It all seems like a bad dream that is finally over but the mess that she has left will clearly be present for a while. I still cant get over the fact that she clearly does not think she did anything wrong. She still believes that we are out to get her and she did nothing wrong. Pheew!!!

Yesterday we were invited to a friends bridal shower. Actually it's my best friend's sister who is getting married and so they had a little hen party for her. To be quite honest it was really boring and most of the things fell pretty flat. The theme was glitz and glamour with pink, silver or purple. Everyone had to dress up and with the weather being really crap it was quite hard deciding what to wear. It was fun getting together with my friend Niks who lives in PE now. Gosh I miss her and although we talk quite often its different. The highlight for us was when we had to play a game where we all had to take a piece of paper with a number written on it. We were not allowed to tell each other what our numbers were. Niks and I shared our numbers and were quite chuffed that we had the same number 00.

Than we had to go outside, take one shoe off and put in in the middle. The aim of the game was that if your number was called, you would have to rush to the middle, grab your shoe and make your way back to your place. The first one back would win a prize. By than Niks and I realised that everyone had the same number and we psyched ourselves to rush first and grab our shoes. As the host called out the number 8 everyone rushed to grab their shoes except Niks and I. The magic number was 8 and not 00. We read it incorrectly. We really felt like 2 tarts. This was vintage Niks and I. We were always like this dof and a little on the blonde side.

Oh well it was fun but to be quite honest a little corny and boring. Visiting the place where I grew up is always a nostalgic experience cos I really had the most amazing childhood and growing up was what movie experiences are made off. Just the fact that I got to spend some time with Niks - was enough to make the day a memorable one.....

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Rant post.....Warning

The nightmares will be returning home today after a week and a half of their absence, I could so get used to that kind of freedom. I do find it quite strange that the Band's parents were away for all this time and not once did they ask to speak to me during many lenghty conversations they had with their son. I don't care - they treat me like a daughter in law and not a daughter so I dont miss anything. To be quite honest its been quite peaceful without the dad's presence and the mum's banshee screaming antics.

However the band called now to ask me what I was cooking for dinner tonight. Now I usually just drop whatever I plan on cooking off at my mum's in the morning and I pick it up in the afternoon on my way home. Convenient and lazy people say, but that is why I have the bestest mother in the whole wide world. I told him what I asked mum to make and than he asked me if there was a lot. I don't usually make a whole lot of food as we are only 2 and the band eats like a bird. So I told him it isnt a lot and when I asked him why he proceeded to tell me that oh cos his parents are coming home and will be home by 6pm.

Grrrr - As if. First of all nobody told me that they were coming home early, nobody told me to cook for them and since they couldnt care less whether I was living or dead while they were away why should I care to cook for them. Besides I have been at work for the whole day, its a different thing if I was at home. Let their beloved pregnant daughter who is suddenly behaving like little miss saint come home and cook for her parents.

I know that I am mean and nasty and I am not usually like this. I am a sun child and am usually really forgiving and will always go out of my way to help everyone. Its not that they ill treat me but its their principles that really get to me at times. It really gets to me that when I see them they talk about everyone under the sun but things that matter. I grapple with the fact that they always preach about others and yet they pretend that nothing is wrong in their own home. I always believe sweep your own door first before sweeping others. It irks me that they appear so normal when clearly they have a problem. I cant understand how they can throw huge boulders and bricks yet they living in a pretty huge glass house if you ask me.

I love the band and its because of him that I am happy. Yes we have our moments and yes we argue and fight and squabble but loving him and him being him makes it all worth it. Even though his family totally pisses me off I am there because of him. I just get upset when it feels like I am being taken advantage off - not by the band - but by the in-laws......

Thursday, July 09, 2009


I haven't been blogging much and although the urge hits me often, I don't have much time. I keep saying that I don't have the time, but I blog mostly at work and things have been hectic. It appears that things have taken a turn for the better here at work. Touch wood. I keep thinking that my luck is going to run out and things are going to start going pear-shaped again. The last few months have been pretty rough but I think I have weathered the stormy waters.

The main person who used to make my life a living nightmare, the MD for one of the departments that I look after, has actually come around. He now says thank you when I take him stuff and doesn't treat me like an idiot. I keep thinking that today something will happen but I am confident that things have gotten much better. My boss even seems a bit different. Maybe the complaints have stopped so she doesn't have need to be irritated. I received a few calls last week from employment agencies and I did send them my cv but to be quite honest I don't think I really want to leave right now.

I had a bit of a meltdown yesterday. I am really grappling with the fact that the band's family haven't mentioned a word to me regarding his sister's pregnancy. I know that it is none of my business and that it does not concern me. However I am a member of their family, I do see them everyday much to my irritation and when I see them they are pretty normal and they talk about everything and everyone under the sun but this. I do feel like an outsider and yesterday I just lost it. The band and I had a huge argument and everything that I have been bottling up since all this started came out. I guess thats why they say that one shouldn't bottle things up. I didn't want to make a big deal about it and kept thinking to myself this is not about YOU, but to be quite honest it is a big deal and it does bother me.

Ever since the sister announced that she is pregnant, they fawn around her like she is some fragile doll. Yes she is with child but don't they care who the father is, is she going to bring this little being up alone, do they not care what their daughter gets up to. Or maybe then they do all know and I am the one in the dark. It's such a twisted story that totally gets me in a tizz and seriously upsets me every single day. I am really battling to make peace with it. I keep repeating this mantra that it is none of my business and does not concern me.

I voiced my feelings to the band yesterday and even though it came out through an argument, I am glad that it has come to light. I am glad that he knows how I feel and I hope that this gives him some food for thought.

In other news, I received some extra cash last month as part of a performance bonus, it wasn't a lot due to the company not meeting all targets etc, but it was something and I purchased a set AMC pots. Hmmmm who ever thought that I would be excited at purchasing pots. They are absolutely lovely and have a lifetime guarantee. My mum has a set and I am so used to them that I had to get my own. Even though I don't cook everyday thanks to mother - I love cooking and I think that the pots are truly an investment.

So here's to happy cooking and less feeling like a loser regarding other people's scandals..... :)

Wednesday, July 01, 2009


I don't know. To be quite honest I am not in a very good space right now. I keep saying I don't care and it's not my problem or its not my family so why should I bother - but honestly I can't seem to move past it and I can't seem to understand why. I am so not like this but....

The Band's sister is pregnant and I supposedly don't know about it. I only know whatever he has told me and that isn't much anymore. Initially when she told him, he seemed really worried about the dad's reaction and we spoke about it and he was really confused about how this all came about. Than about 2 weeks ago the bombshell dropped and nothing. The disaster that we predicted didn't happen, infact quite the opposite. The Band told me that his dad is upset about this but he feels that now at least he will have his own grandchildren instead of spoiling others. The band than one evening very proudly commented that he is going to be an uncle and can't wait to buy the baby fancy branded name clothes. That was when I made a pact with myself not to discuss this with the Band any longer.

I did't want to know what was happening. It sickened me. I don't have anything against single moms or having children out of wedlock. Please I do not have my head buried in the sand but these are people who are quick to comment and judge on other people. They have no qualms about jibing at others, blabbering an opinion or merely just discussing any body who they feel like discussing for the moment. The mum as soon as she sees me will fill me in on everyone's gossip. Like I honestly care. I just felt that I couldn't share the band's excitement because it goes against what I believe in. Besides if she has someone serious, shouldn't she bring him home and maybe get married. Nobody knows, or maybe I just dont know who the father is. Yet she keeps proclaiming to work late - when isn't that excuse is what got her knocked up in the first place. Maybe I am old-fashioned or old school but it just doesn't sit right with me.

Nobody has mentioned a word since all was revealed. I supposedly don't know. To be quite honest, I feel like an outsider. Umm hello what do they think that I don't know anything, that the band and I dont communicate. The band doesn't really say anything anymore either. It is like a non-event in our life and yet he is always hovvering over his sister like she is some fragile doll. I know I shouldn't care. It's got nothing to do with me but what about principles. Do I as a member of their family not have a right to know and what happens when she starts showing. How do they explain that one?

I feel like an outsider.