Monday, January 28, 2008

Down Memory Lane

I feel as if I am drowning. There is just sooo much to do and I don't know if I can do it all. I feel like I have a million and one things to do and I don't really know where to begin. I was a bit miffed this morning cos the weekend went by too quickly and all I wanted to do was sleep.

My weekend was pretty uneventful. Friday I just chilled with Sweets and had the most amazing evening just being alone, chilling and enjoying each other's company. I realised something this morning, that I really really miss him when we are apart. On Saturday I went to a little sleepy town called Heidelberg. It's just down South on the N3 and not very far away. The visit made me me feel nostalgic and I felt a little overwhelmed wiith these emotions. This was the place that I grew up in. I grew up in this little sleepy town, that is now so developed and has become well-known as a retreat away from the city.

As we were driving through the streets, with the sun shining and clouds rolling above us my mind was wandering back to those days when things seemed so easy and carefree. I lived there for 18 years and although I was born in Johannesburg, I grew up in this little town just 55 km from the big city. My childhood is something that movies are made off and I will always treasure those memories. I had this beautiful dollhouse and kids from the neighbourhood could be found at my house from the early hours of the morning until the sun set at night. We would spend hours together after school and during holidays hanging out, playing and just having fun. It was a time of first bicycles and scraped knees and mud cakes.

As we outgrew the dolls and the obsession with our appearances and boys began, it was this journey into young adulthood that sealed the deal on a friendship that is still somehow intact today. Yes we all have our lives but we never cease to keep in touch and my one close friend N, with whom I share a myriad of memories. First kisses and crushes and the tears that accompany a broken heart were all part of this lasting friendship. There were times when we sat outside in cool blowing breeze, bored out of our skulls and yet it was the best time we had because we were together and that was all that counted. It was a time of growing up, finding ourselves and entering adulthood. We were an entourage and it was always the case of the more the merrier.

And than I had to move away - it was the most saddest day of my life. Yes I wasnt relocating far away but still nothing was going to be the same. Time were changing, we were growing up and it was time to move on. We are still close friends but we live in different cities now. Yes we keep in touch by email and phone but we each have our own lives. I miss that at times. The closeness, the freedom of knowing that there is someone who's got your back. Yes i've made new friends and although it is filled with its own memories, I can't forget those that have basically sculpted me in the person I am today. I am glad I got to experience a childhood like that and I would want to give my children the same sort of upbringing one day. In today's society, it's hard but I can try.

As we were driving out of Heidelberg, I didn't feel sad. I have moved on and even though I miss that part of my life at times I realise that I'm all grown up now and things wouldn't have stayed the same. As each one of us grew up and moved on so did I. I only had to do it much sooner than the rest of the clan. If I look back it really was the best experiences that anyone can wish for, even though it was marred by painful situations with regards to my family life. I am glad that I was lucky enough to experience a childhood like mine. As we were driving back towards to Johannesburg a warm glowing feeling overcame me and it made me appreciate the memories of so long ago.....

1 comment:

SleepyJane said...

I know that feeling too. I still get sad though that things will never be the same again. I have such fond memories about all my friends from a few years back and part of me misses that. But as you said everyone has their own lives now.