So T's beloved friend somehow forgot to invite me to her bridal shower so I didn't go regardless that she told his mother and sister. On Saturday I woke up super early as my the salon could only see me at 7:30. The sister obviously thought that I was going, so when I came back she came to tell me she isn't going because B didn't confirm with her. Well she didn't call me at, so I wasn't planning on going. The mum was quite upset with B cos than she still called back on Saturday night to ask the mum why they didn't come and she sent T's sister a text.
This just confirms it. I never liked B and to be honest she doesn't like - so we should cut the pretense and just not pretend at all. Why she suddenly wanted to spend all her time with T and I is beyond me. To be honest, it was probably a ruse to get to spend time with her soon to be husband. T can be so dense at times and will not realise that people are taking advantage of him. I only tolerated her because of him and because she is like a sister to him. He was pretty mad as well. To be honest - I don't care.
I am in the midst of planning a 50th birthday part. My father in law turns 50 on Sunday and the Peter Pan that he is - has insisted that he wants a party. So as of Saturday I have went into planning mode. I just hope all goes according to plan as the parties concerned lack initiative and chutzpah to really pull something wow off. I am not blowing my own horn or anything but seriously they do lack some serious case of INITIATIVE.....
Monday, March 09, 2009
Friday, March 06, 2009
Freaks
So what do you think?
T has a friend called B who is getting married in a few weeks time. Yesterday when I get home, T's mum asks me if B has called me to invite me to her bridal shower. So me forever in the dark when it comes to these things didn't know anything about it. Apparently there was some confusion about whether they were having it or not and now they are so she called T's mum to invite her. T's mum told her to call me and T's sister and let us know. B was adament that she would call me last night. Well she hasn't so technically I haven't been invited. So I'm not going.
Am I being unfair. She called the mum and told her but the mum told me that she told her to call me and she hasn't so I don't feel like I should go. How can you invite someone 2 days before or even a day before in my case. However personally I think her dad slipped up with T's mum and happened to mention it to her yesterday, because she told T's sister that they aren't having anything. So me thinks that they had no intention of inviting us and now just have to because her dad told my mother in law about it. Hmmmmm I bet you I am right.
I am in a dilemma because although she didn't invite me and to be quite honest I don't give a shit because she is so damn irritating I can puke, my MIL will think well I passed on the message to you, so you should go. So annoying. Another wonderful weekend awaits me in FREAKVILLE!!!!!!
T has a friend called B who is getting married in a few weeks time. Yesterday when I get home, T's mum asks me if B has called me to invite me to her bridal shower. So me forever in the dark when it comes to these things didn't know anything about it. Apparently there was some confusion about whether they were having it or not and now they are so she called T's mum to invite her. T's mum told her to call me and T's sister and let us know. B was adament that she would call me last night. Well she hasn't so technically I haven't been invited. So I'm not going.
Am I being unfair. She called the mum and told her but the mum told me that she told her to call me and she hasn't so I don't feel like I should go. How can you invite someone 2 days before or even a day before in my case. However personally I think her dad slipped up with T's mum and happened to mention it to her yesterday, because she told T's sister that they aren't having anything. So me thinks that they had no intention of inviting us and now just have to because her dad told my mother in law about it. Hmmmmm I bet you I am right.
I am in a dilemma because although she didn't invite me and to be quite honest I don't give a shit because she is so damn irritating I can puke, my MIL will think well I passed on the message to you, so you should go. So annoying. Another wonderful weekend awaits me in FREAKVILLE!!!!!!
Wednesday, March 04, 2009
Sucky Feelings
So the position that I am very interested in has been advertised and I do meet the requirements to apply. However I can't apply because there are seperate areas within HR that are undergoing a restructure and if you are unaffected like me you cant apply for any positions until the restructure is complete. I called the hiring manager for this position yesterday just to ask her if I could apply. She was so surprised that I was interested and sounded quite excited when I explained my reasons for wanting to apply. She promised to get back to me, so I am crossing my fingers that there might be some exeption to the rule and I can apply. However I would still need to get approval from my boss who I am not sure if she would authorise me wanting to move less than 12 months in my current position. If I can't apply, I will have to wait and see if the position gets filled and if it doesnt than once the structuring is complete I can have a go at it. If it gets filled now than tough. :(
I haven't been feeling well lately. Low blood pressure again and guess what the meds that I used to take have been discontinued and there is no substitute. I am stuck with eating salt and drinking lots of water. I don't mind the water, but salted stuff can be a bit much at times. I eat Salt and Vinegar crisps like crazy... lol.
Work's been very stressful with neverending dramas that are becomming to stale and pathetic to care anymore. I used to be excel under pressure, strive to overcome challenges and really attempt to beat the odds, but lately I find myself becomming anxious over trivial things and the stresses just keep mounting. It is becomming really tiresome.
The last few weekends have been pretty crazy. T and I really need to create some kind of routine or else we will be saddled with his parents cronies who don't seem to have a life and spend all their weekends together. Although I have no intention of spending time with them, it has become rather annoying. We happen to be right next door so you always know what's happening at the next house. I am a fighter and I wont let anyone take advantage of me, but T's mum can be a really scaly and I don't trust her. Aah the joys of being and Indian daughter-in-law.
I haven't been feeling well lately. Low blood pressure again and guess what the meds that I used to take have been discontinued and there is no substitute. I am stuck with eating salt and drinking lots of water. I don't mind the water, but salted stuff can be a bit much at times. I eat Salt and Vinegar crisps like crazy... lol.
Work's been very stressful with neverending dramas that are becomming to stale and pathetic to care anymore. I used to be excel under pressure, strive to overcome challenges and really attempt to beat the odds, but lately I find myself becomming anxious over trivial things and the stresses just keep mounting. It is becomming really tiresome.
The last few weekends have been pretty crazy. T and I really need to create some kind of routine or else we will be saddled with his parents cronies who don't seem to have a life and spend all their weekends together. Although I have no intention of spending time with them, it has become rather annoying. We happen to be right next door so you always know what's happening at the next house. I am a fighter and I wont let anyone take advantage of me, but T's mum can be a really scaly and I don't trust her. Aah the joys of being and Indian daughter-in-law.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Pity Party
Everything just seems a little off balance at the moment. It is as though the world has decided to pick on me this week. On Sunday T and his dad had an argument over something really dumb in my mind. We haven't seen him since than, although T says that things are fine. On Monday my mum and I had a huge fight. Something petty but huge in my book. I stormed out of the house crying and went home a blubbering mess. We made peace yesterday but it still upsetted me. Today T and I had a fight over a fucking Nintendo game. How lame is that.
My job does not interest me any longer nor does it challenge me in the way that I would like to be challenged. I constantly feel that I am just putting out fires that are petty and nonsense. I am not sure what I want to do but this doesn't seem right for me any longer. It's as though there is a bee that is biting me and I want to do something different. It's as though I am screaming out for change and newness in a positive way. I am not sure what is wrong with me or how to deal with this. I feel trapped.
There is a position that has piqued my interest. I am not sure if I would qualify for the position but it is right up my alley with wanting to do my masters in Psychology next year. I am waiting for it to be advertised so I can apply, however I am not even sure if I would meet the requirements which would be so typical regarding me and my career.
I sometimes wish that I had studied something less complex. If you study medicine, you go on to become a doctor, pharmacy - pharmacist, accounting - accountant. I studied Psychology so naturally one would think that I would end up being a Psychologist. Oh no - one has to their masters and I didn't end up doing it because one needs a great amount of life experience to be considered for the course. This is the avenue that I want to take so I know that I have to apply to do my masters next year.
I am throwing a pity party today.
My job does not interest me any longer nor does it challenge me in the way that I would like to be challenged. I constantly feel that I am just putting out fires that are petty and nonsense. I am not sure what I want to do but this doesn't seem right for me any longer. It's as though there is a bee that is biting me and I want to do something different. It's as though I am screaming out for change and newness in a positive way. I am not sure what is wrong with me or how to deal with this. I feel trapped.
There is a position that has piqued my interest. I am not sure if I would qualify for the position but it is right up my alley with wanting to do my masters in Psychology next year. I am waiting for it to be advertised so I can apply, however I am not even sure if I would meet the requirements which would be so typical regarding me and my career.
I sometimes wish that I had studied something less complex. If you study medicine, you go on to become a doctor, pharmacy - pharmacist, accounting - accountant. I studied Psychology so naturally one would think that I would end up being a Psychologist. Oh no - one has to their masters and I didn't end up doing it because one needs a great amount of life experience to be considered for the course. This is the avenue that I want to take so I know that I have to apply to do my masters next year.
I am throwing a pity party today.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Feeling Weird
I feel like absolute crap. I mean in the physcial sense. I feel tired and my body feels like a thousand trucks spent the night going over it. I woke up really early this morning and actually felt really fine. However soon afterwards I felt really woozy and a little nauseous. I am stressing - I hope I am not pregnant. I really, really hope not.
It's not that I don't want a baby. I do - just not yet. I don't think I am quite ready to have a baby yet. I know that I don't want to work full time when I do have children and I don't think that it will be possible just yet. I would love to do something from home or work flexible hours at least. Besides I still want to do my masters next year. I am really stressed out about this. I guess I could take a pregnancy test. I haven't missed a period yet - so maybe I am stressing for nothing. I checked my blood pressure this morning because I am prone to experiencing low blood pressure at times which makes me feel like this as well. Being anaemic also doesn't help much as I tend to feel crappy a great deal of the time.
I know that I am really tired. Although we are not that hectic at work, things are always stressful here. When I get home there are like a million things to do because I plan these elaborate meals and there is still the cleaning up to do. T helps me at least but I prefer to do it on my own as I have a certain way of doing things. Perfectionist me ok. Today I am making Pasta. Easy pasta - nothing tooo fancy.... I don't mind the cooking bit, I enjoy cooking for T but this past weekend really took it's toll on me. I really need to become more savvy in dodging my Mother in Law and her opportunistic ways otherwise I am going to start really hating weekends.
I really really hope I am not pregnant.
It's not that I don't want a baby. I do - just not yet. I don't think I am quite ready to have a baby yet. I know that I don't want to work full time when I do have children and I don't think that it will be possible just yet. I would love to do something from home or work flexible hours at least. Besides I still want to do my masters next year. I am really stressed out about this. I guess I could take a pregnancy test. I haven't missed a period yet - so maybe I am stressing for nothing. I checked my blood pressure this morning because I am prone to experiencing low blood pressure at times which makes me feel like this as well. Being anaemic also doesn't help much as I tend to feel crappy a great deal of the time.
I know that I am really tired. Although we are not that hectic at work, things are always stressful here. When I get home there are like a million things to do because I plan these elaborate meals and there is still the cleaning up to do. T helps me at least but I prefer to do it on my own as I have a certain way of doing things. Perfectionist me ok. Today I am making Pasta. Easy pasta - nothing tooo fancy.... I don't mind the cooking bit, I enjoy cooking for T but this past weekend really took it's toll on me. I really need to become more savvy in dodging my Mother in Law and her opportunistic ways otherwise I am going to start really hating weekends.
I really really hope I am not pregnant.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Stress
I typed this long post yesterday and got side-tracked in posting in and now I can't find it anywhere. Hmmm so much for auto-save. I really am clueless when it comes to technology.
I went for an interview yesterday morning. The company is teeny tiny, compared to this congolomerate that I work for. It is so in my field of Psychometric assessment and testing, however you only get paid for the number of people that you assess and the number of reports that you generate. There are no benefits to the position either. I think I would be crazy to give up a permanent cost to company salary with benefits and all sorts of other perks and bonuses for a commission type salary. I am just not ready to do something like that. Besides I thought the guy was a bit of an ass.
My weekend was pretty tiring and I was rather peeved off by Sunday lunchtime. Saturday being Val Day, I woke up super early to make T some breakfast. By the time he was ready to leave for work - I had made sunny side eggs, french toast, grilled tomatos, pieces of fried polony, orange juice and coffee. I laid the table with red serviettes and a lovely red candle that I had bought last week from Mr P. I could see he was really surprised. He was working the whole day so I just lounged around and spent the afternoon with my mum. We went out for supper at night and met up with my mum and cousin F and the girls N and N. I offered N and N to sleep over at my house. It was cool, however it was a bit hectic cos usually when they sleep over at my old house, my mum is there to do everything.
We woke up on Sunday morning with no lights so breakfast was a rushed affair of trying to boil water on the gas stove for coffee. My MIL was expecting guests for lunch and I very stupidly offered to make the starter and a salad. I really am very confused with what I should do or shouldn't do. After the drama that happened last week with her and the dad regarding cooking on a Sunday I really don't know if I should offer her assistance or not. She is not someone who likes to be offered help and if you do offer to help her than she just dumps the entire thing on you and doesn't do a thing.
Anyhow I offered to make the starter and the salad but there were no lights so I decided to make the starter at my mum's. I was really feeling for canned fruit with cream so I mentioned to her that I am making some of that. Wasn't that an opportunity for her? As I was leaving to go to my mums', she very candidly shoved a box of instant Malva Pudding and asked me to make it. Me ever the dumb idiot, took it and didn't think twice because how difficult can instant pudding be right. Wrong!
When I got to my mum, she was busy as well in the kitchen and I have now realised that I am no longer used to working in her kitchen anymore. So we began to irritate each other while I tried to make this starter and the pudding and the canned fruit thingy and the salad. Well I didn't end up making the salad cos I was really tired by now. So I went home with all my stuff and I told MIL that I didn't manage to make the salad - thinking that at least T's lazy sister would offer to make it. Well she didn't. The mum than tells me it's fine don't make it. So guess what - I didn't. They weren't my guests, so I don't care. Besides I still had my 2 nieces to take care off. I didn't bother helping to set the table or serve the food because I still needed to get dressed.
What eventually really got to me was that she made me make 2 desserts and when she served dessert she took out the 2 that I had made, ice-cream and the dessert that the lady who was visiting brought. All this for only 2 extra adults and 3 children. I was feeling very frustrated on Sunday and I eventually told T later that night. At least we went out later in the afternoon so I forgot about all the dramas that were plaguing me. I can't understand how a woman can be so lazy when it comes to cooking and entertaining guests. The mum and dad have a weird power struggle between the 2 of them. He loves to have people at his house, she doesn't - unless it's her own people than she will go out of her way to be the perfect hostess. If it's someone that she couldn't give a shit about than she wont and that will be the end of that.
I am not really complaining about her in the sense that she is mean and nasty to me. I just don't like her ways when it comes to cooking and stuff That just gets to me and I can't help but feel stressed about it.
I went for an interview yesterday morning. The company is teeny tiny, compared to this congolomerate that I work for. It is so in my field of Psychometric assessment and testing, however you only get paid for the number of people that you assess and the number of reports that you generate. There are no benefits to the position either. I think I would be crazy to give up a permanent cost to company salary with benefits and all sorts of other perks and bonuses for a commission type salary. I am just not ready to do something like that. Besides I thought the guy was a bit of an ass.
My weekend was pretty tiring and I was rather peeved off by Sunday lunchtime. Saturday being Val Day, I woke up super early to make T some breakfast. By the time he was ready to leave for work - I had made sunny side eggs, french toast, grilled tomatos, pieces of fried polony, orange juice and coffee. I laid the table with red serviettes and a lovely red candle that I had bought last week from Mr P. I could see he was really surprised. He was working the whole day so I just lounged around and spent the afternoon with my mum. We went out for supper at night and met up with my mum and cousin F and the girls N and N. I offered N and N to sleep over at my house. It was cool, however it was a bit hectic cos usually when they sleep over at my old house, my mum is there to do everything.
We woke up on Sunday morning with no lights so breakfast was a rushed affair of trying to boil water on the gas stove for coffee. My MIL was expecting guests for lunch and I very stupidly offered to make the starter and a salad. I really am very confused with what I should do or shouldn't do. After the drama that happened last week with her and the dad regarding cooking on a Sunday I really don't know if I should offer her assistance or not. She is not someone who likes to be offered help and if you do offer to help her than she just dumps the entire thing on you and doesn't do a thing.
Anyhow I offered to make the starter and the salad but there were no lights so I decided to make the starter at my mum's. I was really feeling for canned fruit with cream so I mentioned to her that I am making some of that. Wasn't that an opportunity for her? As I was leaving to go to my mums', she very candidly shoved a box of instant Malva Pudding and asked me to make it. Me ever the dumb idiot, took it and didn't think twice because how difficult can instant pudding be right. Wrong!
When I got to my mum, she was busy as well in the kitchen and I have now realised that I am no longer used to working in her kitchen anymore. So we began to irritate each other while I tried to make this starter and the pudding and the canned fruit thingy and the salad. Well I didn't end up making the salad cos I was really tired by now. So I went home with all my stuff and I told MIL that I didn't manage to make the salad - thinking that at least T's lazy sister would offer to make it. Well she didn't. The mum than tells me it's fine don't make it. So guess what - I didn't. They weren't my guests, so I don't care. Besides I still had my 2 nieces to take care off. I didn't bother helping to set the table or serve the food because I still needed to get dressed.
What eventually really got to me was that she made me make 2 desserts and when she served dessert she took out the 2 that I had made, ice-cream and the dessert that the lady who was visiting brought. All this for only 2 extra adults and 3 children. I was feeling very frustrated on Sunday and I eventually told T later that night. At least we went out later in the afternoon so I forgot about all the dramas that were plaguing me. I can't understand how a woman can be so lazy when it comes to cooking and entertaining guests. The mum and dad have a weird power struggle between the 2 of them. He loves to have people at his house, she doesn't - unless it's her own people than she will go out of her way to be the perfect hostess. If it's someone that she couldn't give a shit about than she wont and that will be the end of that.
I am not really complaining about her in the sense that she is mean and nasty to me. I just don't like her ways when it comes to cooking and stuff That just gets to me and I can't help but feel stressed about it.
Friday, February 13, 2009
Tension
I am in a weird space right now. I just feel very tense and mostly because things at work have been really stressful for me these past few weeks. We are busy with a serious re-alignment excercise and the tension that is building is quite serious. Also the fact that Summer has decided to take a break and we are freezing cold doesn't help matters much. I am cold and that makes me miserable.
Let me not even get started on the traffic situation. I could have cried out of sheer frustration yesterday. It usually takes me 15 min to get home. It took me over an hour. I was so pissed. I am so not used to driving myself. I used to ride to and from work with my brother, so he did all the driving and stressing, while I just sat and entertained him with idle chit chat. Now I have to drive myself and the traffic situation has somehow increased. Crappy crap if you ask me. I know I'm being silly and there are much more important things in this wolrd than me bitching about the weather and the traffic - but still ok. The sun seems to have disappeared.
As for the tension here at work - things are just too crazy for words. First of all we are quiet which is bizarre. This week I found myself scouring the net to pass the time. However this has been shortlived every day of the week. For the whole day we sit twiddling our thumbs and just as its time for the end of the day an avalanche of stuff hits us and it needs to be done NOW. Frustrating at it's best if you ask me.
I am really questioning whether I want to continue doing this. I am finding no joy in it anymore and I keep getting questioned for other people's stuff up's. Really not enjoying this anymore. It just seems that there is too much crap going on at the moment.
T and I will be married for 2 months tomorrow. What we doing for V day - I am not sure. We usually buy each other silly little things, although I haven't bought him anything this year yet. Really not sure what to get him, besides I do believe that it is a huge commercial ploy to ensure consumers spend money that they don't really have. However in the spirit of V day and love and all things nice - I probably will oblige.
As for all these tension's that are threatening to make me explode - I am really glad it's the weekend. Pheeew.....
Let me not even get started on the traffic situation. I could have cried out of sheer frustration yesterday. It usually takes me 15 min to get home. It took me over an hour. I was so pissed. I am so not used to driving myself. I used to ride to and from work with my brother, so he did all the driving and stressing, while I just sat and entertained him with idle chit chat. Now I have to drive myself and the traffic situation has somehow increased. Crappy crap if you ask me. I know I'm being silly and there are much more important things in this wolrd than me bitching about the weather and the traffic - but still ok. The sun seems to have disappeared.
As for the tension here at work - things are just too crazy for words. First of all we are quiet which is bizarre. This week I found myself scouring the net to pass the time. However this has been shortlived every day of the week. For the whole day we sit twiddling our thumbs and just as its time for the end of the day an avalanche of stuff hits us and it needs to be done NOW. Frustrating at it's best if you ask me.
I am really questioning whether I want to continue doing this. I am finding no joy in it anymore and I keep getting questioned for other people's stuff up's. Really not enjoying this anymore. It just seems that there is too much crap going on at the moment.
T and I will be married for 2 months tomorrow. What we doing for V day - I am not sure. We usually buy each other silly little things, although I haven't bought him anything this year yet. Really not sure what to get him, besides I do believe that it is a huge commercial ploy to ensure consumers spend money that they don't really have. However in the spirit of V day and love and all things nice - I probably will oblige.
As for all these tension's that are threatening to make me explode - I am really glad it's the weekend. Pheeew.....
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