Friday, January 15, 2010

To go or not.....


The mum called me today and invited me for lunch on Sunday in honour of the new baby? Its been 2 months and a bit and this is the first time that she has called me.

To go or not to go.......


shameema said...

You should go. You should go with the intention of a fresh start. Yes it's hard to put the past behind you but sometimes it's worth it.... to tell yourself you going to start afresh, give it a go.

Take a present for the baby or even for your SIL,put a smile on yur face. Ignore that she and your MIL have caused such problems in your life. Think of her as a stranger whose just had a baby.

Ring your husband and maybe ask him to pick you up. Tell him you love him and you want to start afresh. Tell him you wiling to forget the past and start fresh. Like two strangers, and make teh effort to do that.

The only person who can change your situation is you, and then watch everything around you change.

You have a chance at making this work, bite the bullet and do it.

You know if you give it your absolute bst and you guys do tr and start over and it still doesnt work then yeh you can leave, you've done it before and you can do it again.

You both will have to learn about who the other person is, and what is important to them. Your husband has not behaved very well but from a strangers point of view from YOUR words, you've also contributed to the breakdown of your marriage. Im sorry to put it so harshly. I come on and I often don't comment, There's so much to say that i tell myself, rather don't say anything.

I deal with family problems everyday and I think that there is a lot of love between the both of you that can help get through the hard times, so use that.

Forgive Forgive Forgive

I wish you the best of luck. I think you deserve your marriage.

niqabi said...

FORGIVE but don't FORGET........some might say thats bad advice....but i'm not saying hold grudges....i'm saying learn from your experiences :)

Anonymous said...

shameema and niqabi both gave very good advice, unfortunately I read this on Monday, but I would have also advised you to go, so I am hoping to read a post about it soon. I'm actually quite surprised his mom invited you, its good. wow I am really excited to read your post on it! I really hope you did go.

Blue Sunflower said...

Shameema - thanks for the message. I don't mind comments, sometimes a little objectivity is needed. So I don't mind. However maybe it's pride or maybe it's stubborness but I couldn't get myself to go not after T couldn't even be bothered to care.

Niqabi - I am all for forgiving. If the Almighty can forgive,who are we. The forgetting is the hard part but that too can come I believe with time. However if only the person in question can make you forget that would be a whole other story.

Anon - I couldn't bring myself to go.

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