Tuesday, May 19, 2009


Why are there days when I have so much to do, that I barely come up for air and than there are days when I have absolutely nothing to do. The days drags and I do feel useless and totally unproductive. I am really seeking or rather searching for something and to be quite honest I am struggling a bit. Work for some time now has been really challenging for me. I must admit that although I enjoy a challenge and actually do quite well under pressure, I feel very demotivated. I really feel that I need to do something different, something that will not only challenge me but will also stimulate me. Why can't I be one of those lucky one's who say I love my job.

I was convinced yesterday that I was pregnant. The monthly crimson wave was 3 days late and I had convinced myself and my mother that this was the case. I even bought a home test but than this morning all was revealed and it so happens that I am not pregnant. To be quite honest, I don't feel ready for that just right now.

So although I feigned an illness on Saturday, nobody ended up going to the Party, so at least I didn't have to pretend that I was having a fabulous time. Sunday T and I spent around Sandton City. It was fun and a lazy day.

I feel very de-motivated when it comes to work..... Too many happenings and a boss who doesn't seem to really care is what is frustrating me at the moment. How much more harder must I try??????


Anonymous said...

Hey Blue :))

Saw the wedding pic, had to search for them as I couldnt remember when you were supposed to get married.

You have very nice hands :))

Anyway! Hope you are well.


angel said...

Oy, seems last month was a month for strange cycles... I was 4 days late!
I know how you feel about work- I'm kinda in the same place, but not because of the work or my boss, I just want to be doing my own thing!